Returning to the job market is hard

So, the last I wrote about me, I was studying my behind off to try to get up to speed on all the new things that have come out in the development world in the last 6 years, since I've been home with the kids.  I worked every night, every nap time and twice a week while both kids were in school.  I studied my behind off (really, I have no butt now).  And, last week, I re-interviewed.  I think I did pretty well.  There was only one question that I answered incorrectly (and it was just there to trick me  [or teach me] anyways) and a couple that I fumbled a little bit with, but got it in the end.  My mock teaching, I think I did pretty well.  I did a lesson on the CSS box model and a lesson on SSL (that I wrote myself).  I didn't get flustered when I was asked questions and I think I handled myself very well.

But, after all that hard work, taking time away from my children so that I could nail this re-interview. They decided that they wouldn't be making me an offer.  They said I'm just not a good fit for their company.

I'm sitting here devastated.  I went down there and interacted with the staff. I thought we all got along well.  I thought I was a great fit for their company.  I want to teach, and they need instructors.  They need a woman instructor, and I'm a woman.  I just don't get it.  I don't know what I could have done different to change the outcome.  They didn't say I wasn't strong enough technically, or that I wasn't good as an instructor.  They said it was about ME as a person.  So, all that hard work, and they just didn't like ME.  I'm hurt. What is it that they didn't like about me?  How can I fix what I don't know is wrong?

So, my readers ... tell me.  What about my personality makes you not want to hire me?  Really?  I'm trying to make myself a better person, but I can't fix what I don't know is wrong.  Please help me.

Jade's 6th Birthday Party

So, a week after Maxwell's party, we were back at the YMCA for Jade's 6th birthday!  She wanted an adventure party, so I had a little bit more work to get this one right for her, but in the end, she loved it, her friends seemed to have a good time, so I think it was a success.

We again used the local YMCA and decided to follow a similar schedule as last weekend, since it went so well. So, we had the pizza, cheese ball and drinks ready when everyone arrived.  Everyone came in and chatted and ate pizza for a little while.  Then, it was scavenger hunt time.  I did 6 clues and tried to make them easy enough where kindergarteners wouldn't have to ask for too much help.  The first clue I just handed them.    On the bottom of each clue there was a letter or two to be used later.

"If you’re in a hungry mood, go here first and find some food."

The next clue was found next to the pizza boxes.  "Go to the place that doesn’t match."  Underneath the words there was a picture of a tennis court, a garden, a forest path and a desert.  

The next clue was found on the tennis court.  "Solve the puzzle to find the next clue."  Underneath the words were pictures of a basket and a beach ball.  

The next clue was found on the basketball court.  "Cross off all the letters in the word GUM.  The remaining word will be the location of the next clue."  Below that was a grid of letters.  When all instances of G-U-M were removed, it spelled "STAIRS TO POOL".

The next clue was found on the stairs. "Your next clue can be found on the door to a place where you wash your hands. " 

The next clue was found on the door to the bathroom.  "Use the letters from your clues to determine where the treasure is."  When they gathered up all of their clues and set them out in a row, it spelled "UPSTAIRS".  They all ran upstairs to find the treasure!  

For the treasure, I used valentine treat bags and put 2 pieces of candy in each one.

After that it was cupcake time!  Jade wanted strawberry, so I made a strawberry angel cupcake with a white frosting.  I made a few extra with chocolate frosting because I knew that would be delicious.

For the favors for this party, I got little notebooks and I decorated each one with the guest's name and some cute star stickers.  And, each guest received a pen to write in their book with.

After cupcake time was finished, we ventured up to the bounce house.  Jade wasn't having much fun in the bounce house, so our awesome staff at the YMCA set up the gymnastics mats in the racquetball court, so there would be some more fun to be had.  In the end, she had a blast and loved every  minute of her party.

For decorations, I again went simple.  I bought a single balloon (that I let her pick out) and made a banner that said "Happy 6th Birthday Jade" with her picture on each end and hung it on the window.

The awesome banner made by my Mom was hung over the present table.

 I survived another year of world-wind birthday parties and I have two very happy kids, so I'm a happy Mom!

Maxwell's 3rd Birthday Party

Well, I did it!  I made it through Christmas and managed to pull off the kids' birthday parties.  First, Let me talk about Maxwell's.  He was turning 3, so we did a "balls" party.  We had it at the local YMCA (which was amazing).

Of course, 3 days before his party, I was notified of a scheduling conflict at the YMCA, so we had to rearrange our schedule.  But, luckily everything worked out great.  Instead of playing first, we ate first and then played once the other group was finished with that area.

The staff at the YMCA was amazing!  They went out of their way to make sure everything was taken care of and we were happy.  I would definitely recommend them, if you live in the San Antonio area.

So, Maxwell loves chocolate, so I made chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting for him.  They also had a peanut butter filling.  I know that not everyone likes so much chocolate, so I made a few with a white frosting.  Then, I decorated them with a soccer ball ring.  They were delicious.  Unfortunately, the kids were scared by the peanut butter filling, so I've learned for kids parties, skip the filling next time.

For favors, I bought water bottles (sport themed, right?).  And I decorated each one with the name of his friend and some ball stickers!  And, the tag said "Thank you for celebrating Maxwell's 3rd birthday!  We had a ball!"  I also made sure that there were plenty for siblings to take a bottle home too, although siblings didn't get their name on theirs.

For decorations, I bought one birthday balloon to put on Maxwell's chair and then I made a banner that said Happy 3rd Birthday Maxwell, and it had a picture of him on each side.  I hung that one on the window.  And, last minute, my Mom decided to make him one of her famously awesome birthday signs.  That one is picture below and was hung over the present table.  Lastly, I made an "about Maxwell" sign and hung that over the cake/favor table.

When the kids arrived, we had pizza, water, juice boxes, and cheese ball with chips and veggies. We also had coloring pages and crayons so his friends could color him a picture.  After food, coloring and cake, we went up and had a blast in the bounce castle.

Everyone had a wonderful time, most importantly, Maxwell did.  He was so excited to celebrate with all of his friends.

How to make a busy month even busier

Everyone knows that December is one of the busiest months for just about everyone, especially mothers.  Well, I figured out a way to make it even busier.

To start December, I had a job interview for a really promising job ... one that I could see myself enjoy.  Well, the phone interview went well, so they asked me to do a code challenge, using a language and framework that I had never used before, and turn it around in 7-10 days.  This all happened while my husband was out of town for work, so I was single parenting for a week.

So, for the first 2 nights after putting the kids to bed, I taught myself PHP.  Then, the next 2 nights, I reviewed Laravel examples to learn the framework.  Then, the next 2 nights I tried to get an environment set up to start my project. So, 6 days out of the 7-10 gone, and I hadn't even started the project.  But, I got a working environment, and I got to work.  In one day (nap time and then bed time), I got a working project done.  It was perfect, but it worked and did the job, and I turned it in.

The next day, I got a request to come in for a code review.  So, I made arrangements to go down to the office and met with them to go over what I did.  On my way home, I got an email requesting a technical interview (a 5 hour adventure).

So, I made arrangements for me to do that next.  I studied what I could and I went down.  Well, I didn't do very well, but I was given a neat opportunity to re-interview in another month.

So, that was my first 2 weeks of December.  So, Christmas cards hadn't been addressed or sent out yet. Present weren't finished.  And, my children's January birthday parties hadn't been prepared for.  So, over the next week, I scrambled and got all 125 Christmas cards addressed.  I got the birthday invitations made and sent out.  I got all of the Christmas presents bought and mailed.  And, I have started putting together everything I need for their birthday parties.

I still don't have all of the Christmas presents wrapped, but I'm close.  I still have 2 days to get it all done.  I'm freaking out about the birthday parties, but I think they both will understand if they aren't perfect parties.  They will love whatever I put together for them.

Thanksgiving

We are finishing out the Thanksgiving weekend here at the Breiding house.  It is Sunday afternoon.  Everyone in the house is napping, and I am sitting on the couch, by the fire, trying to stay warm and get birthday stuff ready (Yes, I know it is over a month away, but it will be here before you know it).

We had two Thanksgivings this year.  Last Sunday, our friends from Houston came to visit.  They have a little boy who is the same age as Maxwell, so the kids were super excited about it. In fact, when they left, they both wanted to know if he could come live with us and be their brother. For that dinner, I went all out.  I got up at 5 a.m., stuffed the turkey and got it in the oven.   I made everything from scratch, including the cream of mushroom soup in the green bean casserole, and the dough for the crescent rolls.  And, I made pumpkin ice cream tartlets for dessert.  It was big and delicious.  So, we started eating turkey every day last Sunday.

Then, Thanksgiving got here.  Well, you can't skip the day without having a celebratory meal, so, my husband smoked a turkey.  I made an asparagus casserole, and we ate the Stuffing-flavored potato chips our friends left behind.

So, it's been a week, and I've made turkey empanadas, turkey salad, turkey casserole, turkey nachos, turkey melts, turkey sandwiches ... you name it, I've made it with turkey.  And, I still have at least a quarter of a turkey left.

But, I'm not complaining.  It is just pushing my creativity up another notch.

I am thankful that my husband has a job that allows me to stay home and come up with creative new ways to use turkey after thanksgiving.  I am thankful that my kids eat more than just the bread on thanksgiving day and every day.  I am thankful that when I made turkey casserole, both of my children told me how delicious it was.  I am thankful that my house is part-way decorated for Christmas.  I am thankful that my Christmas shopping is almost done.  I am thankful that my wonderful husband makes me warm fires and hot tea to keep me warm on these cold Texas days. I am thankful that, even though I wake up every day feeling terrible and I don't want to get out of bed, I do get out of bed and have two wonderful children to push me through each day.  I am thankful for so many things, but mostly I'm thankful for have Jeremy, Jade, and Maxwell.  They are my reasons for everything.

Happy Thanksgiving!

When it feels like nothing is going your way

I'm sitting here on a Thursday afternoon, wondering why I feel like this.  I am down ... really down.  The only thing I can think of is that it has been a bad week.

First, this is always an off week, with daylight savings time ending on Sunday.  Everyone's schedules are all off.  Both kids and the husband are both up way too early every day and that throws off my schedule.  I can't comfortably get my daughter ready for school and prepare myself for the boys, when they are both up before I leave to take her.  My whole day is thrown askew.

Next, my daughter is testing me, or feeling needy or something because on Tuesday, she decided she wasn't going to do what she was told.  So, when I took away her kindle because she refused to put her clothes away, she screamed at me.  I'm not talking a little yell, or her typical humph.  She outright screamed and cried because I wouldn't give her the kindle.  When she would calm down, I took her favorite toy away, and that just made her scream even more (which I expected, but I'd hoped she would see that I meant business and wanted her to stop screaming).

Wednesday wasn't an easy day, but at least there wasn't any screaming.  My husband's volleyball game was canceled, though, so my quiet relaxation time was disturbed.

Now, here we are on Thursday, and this time it was my son's turn.  After a long day at school and waiting for his nap until after we picked up his sister from school, we came home to read stories and finally nap.  I read his first story just fine and he sat in his "I'm really tired" position.  When I went to read the second story, he kept interrupting me.  When, the third time, he said "I don't want that story, I want this story" and I told him to stop and listen or he wouldn't get any story.  He again interrupted that he wanted a different story, so I stopped reading and put him in bed.  At this point, he sat up and screamed, a blood-curdling scream.  I told him to lay down and go to sleep, and he continued to scream, for 30 minutes, until he finally fell asleep.  He wouldn't listen to anything I said, he just wanted to scream.

So, I'm sitting here.  The screaming has stopped and he's napping peacefully with his little butt in the air.  Jade is playing school with her mini figures quietly on her bed.  I have applied for my 5th job this week (about my 100th this year).  I've gone through the mail and all the school papers.  and, I have about 20 minutes before I have to get up to make dinner.

I want to cry, but seeing what time it is, I know that my daughter will be in here very soon begging to play with her kindle, which will probably lead to her screaming at me when I tell her no again.  I want to bury my head under the covers and just go to sleep, but I have to get up to make dinner sooner than I could fall asleep.  I just want to hide somewhere where no one can scream at me, or tell me that I did something else wrong, or tell me I'm just not good enough.  I want to run away to a place where everyone loves every meal I cook, and I don't have to fight to get one kid to eat their meat and the other kid to eat their vegetables.  Just like every other stay at home mom out there, I want to feel loved and appreciated.

Here's to hoping that tomorrow is a better day, or at least next week is a better week.

What do I want to do?

I have a 5 year old and a 2 year old.  My 2 year old is potty trained. He even just switched to wearing underwear at night.  So, I haven't had to change a diaper for my own children in a long time.  I am done!!!

But, the last couple of weeks, I have been substitute teaching at my son's preschool, and the teacher in the baby class has been out sit for a while and I've been in that class 3 days now.  The first time I subbed in there, I changed 16 diapers in 3 hours (6 of which were stinky).  The second day I subbed wasn't as bad, only 1 stinky diaper, but still, a lot of wet diaper changes. The third day, also, not as bad.

The teacher that is out sick is not sure what is wrong yet, but should find out soon.  My big decision comes in if the teacher needs to be out long term, do I want to be a stable teacher in that class and take over for her?  Do I want to change diapers every day for a long time?

If I did take over for her on a long-term basis, things would have to change from the current situation.  I would need to be the lead teacher in the room and run the class, not the current assistant who has been running, since I'm just a temporary substitute.   But, if I do that, will I be happy.  I have been exhausted from just 3 days of substituting.

Well, I don't currently have a decision to make, but if they do need me, can I (or should I) do it?