When will the screaming stop?

My son is 16 months old.  He has just reached the stage where if he doesn’t get when he wants, he screams.  And, it’s not a cute, quiet scream.  It is a blood-curdling, I’m-going-to-die scream.  It has been going on for a few weeks now, and it’s killing me.

My daughter, now 4, went through this stage, and it lasted about 2 weeks.  Maxwell is twice as loud and has already passed that mark.  So, what’s the difference?  By the time Jade was 16 months, she could clearly say about 35-50 words.  Maxwell, on the other hand, speaks about 15 words, and not very clearly.  He’s having trouble communicating what he wants and it is getting to him.  Therefore, he wants everyone to know when he is unhappy.

Now, I’ve been sick for about 3 weeks now.  It started out with a fever and has lingered with a terrible headache, swollen glands, pains, and more.  So, when my sweet little boy screams, the headache just gets worse.

But, I know the last thing I should do is to give in to him when he screams.  And, thinking quickly has become very difficult.  So, we’re struggling.

When everyone is happy, we talk a lot and I try to get him to communicate with us.  But, he doesn’t seem to want to talk.  Jade would sit in her crib and practice her words at this age.  Maxwell is pretty quiet.

So, I’m looking for ideas on how I can get my sweet little screamer to want to talk more.  Any suggestions are greatly appreciated!

Another holiday in Texas

We’ve been in San Antonio for almost 5 months now.  We’ve celebrated Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, 3 birthdays, Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day, and now Easter.  It’s kind of nice being alone with my perfect family, but it is a bit lonely not having any family around.

I’m loving it here, actually.  Sure, I miss Disney.  Sure, I miss our friends.  Sure, it’s tough being out here with no help.  But, Jade’s school is great!  She is learning so much.  There is really so much to do, that we’re busy all the time.  I like a lot of the nice people that we’ve met.  We’re making some good friends.

I really wish Jeremy were happier.  His job is not what he expected it to be and he’s feeling stressed.  I want to see him happy, and I’m trying to figure out how to do that. I just don’t know what to do.  I know it is not my responsibility to make him happy.  I can be here for him. I can take care of him.  I can give him everything he wants, but it is up to him to make himself happy.  I just wish he could find a way to be happy.  It sucks!

So, we’re in Texas, and we’re having a great time being a perfect family of 4. Our holidays have been so fun and relaxed.  We’ve set our own pace and done our own things.  We didn’t have to rush around to make everyone else happy and meet every one else’s expectations.  We played with our kids.  We ate meals that we wanted.  We enjoyed each other!  I love it!

Surviving the 4-year-old

I heard all this time that the 2s were the worst age for kids (until the teenage years).  Well, Jade was an angel at 2.  Then, my friends said that the 3s were the worst.  Jade wasn’t so bad, but toward the end, she started to get a little “fresh.”  Well, now we’ve hit 4, and she is uncontrollable.  Does it get any better?

Today I heard, “I’m the ruler of this kingdom. You have to do what I say. I don’t have to do what you say.”  She’s 4!  Really?!

I did it, and then I thought I was going to die, alone

I ran my first official 5k, the Disney’s Cinderella Royal Family 5k.  I ran it in 42 minutes.  I was very excited and so very proud of myself.

I was in wave 3 of 5.  16 minutes after the first runners started, it was my turn.  It started in the EPCOT parking lot and I started out strong.  I passed by a bunch of people, and was passed by a few that took off fast.  Everyone had told me that there was so much excitement and music, so don’t wear headphones, so I didn’t turn my music on.  The first mile was quiet and through nothingness.  It was tough and I was starting to doubt my ability to do it.  I passed mile 1 and slowed down a little bit so that I could turn my music on to give me some momentum.

Shortly after that, I entered EPCOT, around Mexico.  That is when there was music and cast members cheering and all kinds of excitement (of course, right after I turned my music on).  I ran around EPCOT, past Norway and China, by Germany, Italy, Japan, Morocco, and France.  I walked for about 10 seconds up the hill heading over to the United Kingdom around mile marker 2, but picked back up the run.  We ran behind the United Kingdom and came back by Canada.  We ran up to the front of the park, around Spaceship Earth and then back up toward it and out the side of the park into the parking lot.   I saw mile marker 3 and knew that I was almost there.  I rounded the bend and saw the finish line.  I felt okay, but all I wanted was to see my family.  I kept running, but I kept looking and then I saw them – my wonderful husband and my two beautiful children.  That gave me everything I needed to cross the finish line.   I finished and I got my medal!

We had a wonderful vacation until the day we were returning home.  Then I started to feel horrible.  I had terrible abdominal pains.  Then I threw up the entire flight home.  So, we went to urgent care straight from the airport, and they sent me to the ER with appendicitis.

So, here I am 2 weeks after my first official 5k, with 3 holes in my abdomen.  And they say running is good for you.  I am here to say, it is not!

1 week until my 5K

I’ve been running for about 10 years now.  But, I could never get past the 2 mile mark for the longest time.  I try and try, but my chest tightens up, phlegm starts to build up in my chest, and I start coughing. I find it hard to go on.

2 months after Maxwell was born, I decided that I was going to run a 5K.  I started running, and the same thing happened.  But, come a few months later, I decided that I was going to do it, no matter what, and I registered for the Princess 5K at Disney.  I’d have a year after Maxwell’s birth to get it.  I found that, once I hit the wall, even stopping didn’t matter.  The coughing actually got worse when I stopped.  So, one day, I just kept running, through the pain … through the inability to breath.  And, surprising enough, after a half mile, it got a little easier.  I finished my first 5K.  When I got home and sat down, I still felt like I was going to die.  I coughed all day long.  I could barely pick up my kids, I was so weak.

Then, 3 months ago, we moved to San Antonio.  It’s harder here to run.  The hills are just too much.  I haven’t been able to run a full 5K since we moved here.  I have to walk up the bigger hills, but my pace has been close to an acceptable pace over-all.  I’m just very nervous about next week.  Plus, the benefits I was hoping for when I started this haven’t come true.

I’ve now run/walked a 5k, once a week for the past few months  now.  Do I feel better?  No.  Am I healthier?  No.  I’m actually less healthy.  Since I started running, I’ve gained 10 pounds for each mile that I added.  So, in the past 4 months, I’ve gained 20 pounds!  Does my daughter see someone she can be proud of?  No.  In fact, on my last run, while I was pushing the 60 pound stroller up the huge hill, coughing, she said to me, “Mommy, why are you going so slow?  Why aren’t you running?”

So, I’m 1 week from my 5K.  I still don’t know if I’ll be able to finish, or if the “your going too slow” cart will pick me up part way through the run.  I need to finish.  I need to see my daughter’s face as I cross the finish line.  I need my husband to be proud of me for finishing.

But what next?  The reason I started this was to get healthier.  But, 20 extra pounds later that hasn’t happened.  I couldn’t imagine pushing myself further and gaining more weight. What’s my new goal? I’ll keep you posted when I figure it out.  I’m open to any suggestions, especially from my fitness friends!

Contemplating returning to work

When I had my daughter, there was no question. I couldn’t imagine leaving her all day.  I quit my job in an instant.  Now, 4 years later, I still feel the same way, but there are other factors that have me here today.

We recently moved to San Antonio.  So, now we have a mortgage to pay as well as rent.  Things are more expensive here than what they were in Orlando.  We have a nest egg that is going to slowly dwindle away to nothing if we don’t do something. And, there is a job opening up at the company Jeremy works for that would be perfect for me.

Maxwell is only 1 year old.  The thought of putting him in day care tears me apart.  I would probably cry for the first month at the office.  Jade is 4 and starting full-time preschool in the fall.  She is having such a hard time to adjusting to everything already, that me leaving all day would be very hard on her too.

I know we could make it work.  I know I would get through it.  I know the kids would adapt.  They are strong.  And, we would be making enough money to be able to focus on family time on the weekends.  I’d greatly appreciate any thoughts from my readers.  What would you do?  What do you suggest I do?

Happy Birthday to me!

Well, I’m another year older!  I’m not one of those people who is afraid of getting older. I love my birthday.  How did this one go?

I’m 38 years old, just 2 years away from the big 4-0, and my husband will not let me forget it.  But, I’m not bothered by that.  Everyone has to get older. But, luckily, I have 2 very small children that keep me very young.  I don’t feel 38.  I don’t feel old (well, except for the aches and pains).

This year was tough.  Back in Florida, I had just started to get some real friends over the last few years.  I had people who were there for me when I needed them, who would call me to do things.  But, just 2 1/2 months ago, we moved away, to San Antonio, TX, where we know nobody.  So, this birthday, there was no dinner with friends, there was no party. I started to feel sad.  I got 6 phone calls and 4 texts.  1 friend called.  None of those friends I thought I had in Orlando called or even texted me.  None of them sent a card.  I got Facebook posts from them, but when you are someone’s friend, you would think a text message would be sent.

I at least have 2 wonderful children and 1 amazing husband.  They took very good care of me on my birthday. I am so lucky to have them.